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那天提到Higginson给投稿者的信——没过几天,H就收到了一个读者给他的“回信”。30年后(1892年),他对当时的情景还记忆犹新:1862年4月16日,他收到一封信,信来自Amberst(麻省的一个小城市),笔迹怪怪的,像鸟化石老师教的(as if the writer might have taken her first lessons by studying thefamous fossil bird-tracks in the museum of that college town),古雅独特(quaint and wholly unique),爱用破折号,用大写字母,像古英语,也像德语,每个名词都分得很清楚。奇怪的是信没有落款——却写在另一张卡片上,装在小信封里。签名很羞涩,用铅笔写的,仿佛躲在帘儿底下,怕人看见。看那签名,是Emily Dickinson。
H是有名的活动家(宗教的、女权的),也是大文人,不过他也许会感到悲哀的是,他今天留名,却是因为从这封信开始的与后来成为大诗人的Emily的文字缘。
Emily的信很独特,犹如一首小诗:
MR. HIGGINSON,
——Are you too deeply occupied to say if my verse is alive?
The mind is so near itself it cannot see distinctly, and Ihave none to ask.
Should you think it breathed, and had you the leisure totell me, I should feel quick gratitude.
If I make the mistake, that you dared to tell me would giveme sincerer honor toward you.
I inclose my name, asking you, if you please, sir, to tellme what is true?
That you will not betray me it is needless to ask, sincehonor is its own pawn.
没有客套话,也没有自我介绍,开门见山:先生太忙,想是没空评说我的诗歌是死是活吧?满篇都在请H评论她的诗,但似乎又没一句是请求。
第二句是礼貌的谎言——她不是没人问,她常和嫂子Susan分享她的诗。
最后一句,honor is its own pawn(原文its写成了it’s),大概是借了莎翁的话:“Alas, sweet wife, myhonor is at pawn, And, but my going, nothing can redeem it.”(Henry IV, part 2,act 2: 3)。据Webster词典的解释,pawn, a stake hazarded in awager; in pawn, at pawn, in the state of being pledged。荣誉被抵押出去了,只有前进才能把它赎回来。(朱译似乎原作“我的荣誉已经动摇”,校本已经改了。)
Emily手迹
不知是不是那封信的信封
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