湖南蛮子的自留地分享 http://blog.sciencenet.cn/u/肖立志 研究石油测井和核磁共振,看杂书,养牧羊犬,偶尔斗斗地主。

博文

Going Home: It Will Be Different

已有 6975 次阅读 2007-12-21 20:18 |个人分类:个人偏见

真快,上大学的女儿放寒假了!

下午到机场接她,变化真的不小。第一个要求是晚上去正宗的湘菜馆,吃一顿辣辣的湘菜!她说华盛顿的中餐太难吃了。我带她去了农大旁的“菜湘根”,要了“驴三鲜”和“猪血丸子炒腊肉”,她和妹妹都吃的特香!说是估计两天不会想饭吃。 

回到家,我打开邮件,女儿学校“家长协会”追着发来一封邮件,提醒所有的新生家长,你们的孩子与上大学前已经很不一样了。下面是这封信的内容。

确实是很好的提醒!

In the Office of Parent Services we recognize the need to educate parents on how different your student’s life will be when they return home for the Winter Break. When students are away from home they undergo experiences which are truly self-defining. Leaving home increases your student’s individuality and independence as they begin to create a path for themselves. For the past few months your student has been making their own decisions regarding every aspect of their life: when to eat, study, seek medical attention, socialize and sleep! I understand that when students are home, they are expected to follow the rules that guide each family and each household. However, I want to make you aware of the life changes your student may have undergone in their transition from adolescents to early adulthood.
           

The first few days of break, parents worry because their student is sleeping too much.  They are still recovering from final exams, but they also use sleep as a way to gradually fit back into home routines.  It’s also good to be back in their own beds!  In addition to sleep, other things that many students will do when they return home are eat and visit friends!

 

Here are some things I would like to make you aware of when your student arrives home for Winter Break:

 

1. Questions that your student may not like to be asked by you:

 

a. Where are you going?
b. Who are you going with?
c. What time are you returning home?

d. Why are you sleeping so much?

e. Are you taking care of yourself?


2. As a parent, remind your student of your expectations regarding:


a. Religious events
b. Social events
c. Family meals
d. Family chores

e. Curfews *Remember that your student does not have a curfew at college


3. Situations that could arise with siblings:


a. Who will drive the family/students car?
b. Who has control over the TV, phone, computer?
c. Student’s room (if sibling now sleeps there)
d. Who does what daily chores?

 

4. Don’t do everything for your student.  Let them take responsibility for the things they are now handling at school:

a.  Scheduling medical appointments

b. Cleaning their room

c. Work Schedule


Try not to remove all of the freedoms that your student has become accustom to over the past four months.  They have developed a new way of life and reverting back to the way things were before they left may cause stress.

 

5. For parents of an only student/empty-nesters:


a. I feel for you! I know your life has changed significantly since your student left the house and it will be a big adjustment for you to have them back. When they return I want to remind you to be open-minded and sensitive to your student’s needs during this transition.


Also, remember your student has become very NOCTURNAL
.  They love to sleep all day, and stay up all night! 

 

Advice I give to students:


1. Communicate with your parents and family.  It is very important for both parents and students to understand the changes that have occurred not only in the students life but also in life at home.
2. Be considerate (it goes a long way).
3. Remember that change is good. Let your parents know about tattooing, piercing
and hair color before you get home. Do not go for shock value!
4. Your younger siblings and pets may respond to you differently when you return home (they don’t
understand why you left).

5. Understand that you will have to and should make compromises with your time.

6. Communicate with your parents in advance if you have less than satisfactory grades to report.  There is no use in prolonging the inevitable.  Be honest and most importantly take responsibility for your actions.

Parents, if things get rough and you would like to discuss specific occurrences, please feel free to call the Office of Parent Services at xxxx. The Office of Parent Services was established to help you deal with certain situations or instances involving students, parents and families.

 

In addition, I would encourage you to speak with you student about school and their accomplishments over the past semester.  Your student has come a long way in only four months.  Be proud of their accomplishments.  I hope that each of you have a wonderful and safe Holiday.  See you in the Spring at the Cherry Blossom Festival!
 
Regards and Happy Holidays,


Director, Parent Services



https://blog.sciencenet.cn/blog-2401-13059.html

上一篇:解决能源问题需要新的思维方式
下一篇:《集结号》——牺牲为了什么

0

发表评论 评论 (4 个评论)

数据加载中...
扫一扫,分享此博文

Archiver|手机版|科学网 ( 京ICP备07017567号-12 )

GMT+8, 2022-6-29 03:10

Powered by ScienceNet.cn

Copyright © 2007- 中国科学报社

返回顶部