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科技写作漫谈(96)：遣词造句要引导读者的预期
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单词在句子中的位置十分重要，是读者理解句子所需的绝大部分线索。读者对每个句子的结构有自己的预想，如果事实与预想不符，他们就不得不将精力转向探索文章结构而非内容，如此便会增加错误理解或无法理解的可能性。更糟糕的是，一旦读者无法弄清句子结构，就会失去阅读兴趣。因此，作者需要特别关注词的位置，并精心组织文章结构。
作者的任务不仅是选择正确的词，还要以最有效的方式对单词进行定位，以引导和满足读者的预期，使大多数读者能如作者所愿地理解文章。
例1: Mosquitoes often carry parasites.
该句中，“mosquitoes”一词被放在句子开头即主题的位置，而“parasites”被放在句子结尾即被强调的位置。对多数读者而言，这种结构表明之前作者在谈论“mosquitoes”(蚊子)，此后将进入新话题 —— “parasites”(寄生物)。
同样一句话版本不同强调的内容便不同：
例2: Parasites are often carried by mosquitoes.
虽然例2和例1使用的单词相同，但词的位置不同。在2中，“parasites”变为大家熟知的话题出现在句首的位置，而“mosquitoes”作为被强调的词放在了句尾，这对读者起到了一种指示作用。作者想通过强调这个词让读者迅速了解文章的重点在蚊子而非跳蚤或老鼠；作者也想通过将“mosquitoes”置于句尾(强调的位置)试图让读者领悟到，文章即将进入一个新话题(mosquitoes)，以引导读者的注意力。
练习：改写下面三段文字，注意单词的位置，使读者能够轻松追随信息的逻辑性
A: Vegetative cells are cells that are engaged in active growth and reproduction. Endospores can be produced by some bacteria that can cease vegetative growth. Endospores are highly resistant to heat, chemicals, and radiation, unlike vegetative cells. It is possible that the unique structure of the peptidoglycan layer of the spore is in some way associated with resistance.
B: Mangrove plantations attenuate tsunami-induced waves and protect shorelines against damage. Human activities on the shorelines most damaged by the great 2006 tsunami had reduced the area of mangroves by 26%. Communities can be buffered from future tsunami events by conserving or replanting coastal mangroves and greenbelts. The conservation of dune ecosystems or green belts of other tree species could fulfill the same buffer as mangroves elsewhere.
C: A quantum dot is a semiconductor nanostructure that confines the motion of conduction band electrons, valence band holes, or excitons in all three spatial directions. It has a discrete quantized energy spectrum. A small number (on the order of 1-100) of conduction band electrons, valence band holes, or excitons are contained in a quantum dot. Colloidal semiconductor nanocrystals are small quantum dots, which can be as small as 2 to 10 nanometers, corresponding to 10 to 50 atoms in diameter.
参考答案
A: Vegetative cells are cells that are engaged in active growth and reproduction. Vegetative growth can be ceased by bacteria that can produce endospores. Unlike vegetative cells, endospores are highly resistant to heat, chemicals, and radiation. Resistance may be associated with in some way with the unique structure of the peptidoglycan layer of the spore.
B: Mangrove plantations attenuate tsunami-induced waves and protect shorelines against damage. On the shorelines most damaged by the great 2006 tsunami, the area of mangroves had been reduced by 26% through human activities. By conserving or replanting coastal mangroves and greenbelts, communities can be buffered from future tsunami events. The same buffer could be fulfilled elsewhere by the conservation of dune ecosystems or green belts of other tree species.
C: A quantum dot is a semiconductor nanostructure that confines the motion of conduction band electrons, valence band holes, or excitons in all three spatial directions. It has a discrete quantized energy spectrum. A quantum dot contains a small number (on the order of 1-100) of conduction band electrons, valence band holes, or excitons. Small quantum dots, such as colloidal semiconductor nanocrystals, can be as small as 2 to 10 nanometers.
摘编自《科技写作与交流》(任胜利 等 译. 科学出版社, 2012年出版)
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