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科技英语写作基础(系列):分析一篇abstract(海洋大数据) 精选

已有 6466 次阅读 2019-2-22 07:01 |个人分类:Scientific Writing|系统分类:教学心得| 科技英语写作

我常常改海洋、气象、气候研究的文章。今天分析一篇海洋专业的摘要。 

分析的目的是帮助青椒提高科技英语写作水平。我是针对摘要,不针对作者。


https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fmars.2019.00019/full?utm_source=F-AAE&utm_medium=EMLF&utm_campaign=MRK_914840_45_Marine_20190221_arts_A

 

Yes, We Can! Large-Scale Integrative Assessment of European Regional Seas, Using Open Access Databases

评论髦的标题。比较多见的是Integrated Assessment。

[1] Substantial progress has been made in assessing marine health in an integrative way. 

评论:marine health?marine ecosystem health?

[2] However, managers are still reluctant in undertaking such assessments, because: (i) lack of indicators; (ii) absence of targets; (iii) difficulty of aggregating indicators from different ecosystem components, habitats, and areas; (iv) absence of criteria on the number of indicators to be used; (v) discussion on the use of “one-out, all-out” (OOAO) principle in aggregating; and (vi) lack of traceability when integrating data. 

评论:虽然长,但是,清清楚楚的。


[3] Our objective was, using open access databases with indicators across all the European seas with agreed targets, to demonstrate if the Nested Environmental status Assessment Tool (NEAT), can be used at the European scale, serving to managers and policy-makers as a tool to assess the environmental status under the Marine Strategy Framework Directive (MSFD). 

评论:was, using这里的逗号,应该去掉。后面的两个逗号,好像也是多余的。

 

[4] We have used MSFD Descriptor D3 (commercial fish) from 341 stocks, 119 species and two indicators from each of them (years 2013–2015); D5 (eutrophication) with 90th percentile of Chlorophyll-a (years 2009–2014); and D8 (contaminants), with Anthracene, Fluoranthene, Naphthalene, Cadmium, Nickel, and Lead as indicators (years 2009–2013). 

评论:Chlorophyll-a不用大写和-符号。用过去式。


[5] We have calculated the environmental status for each European subdivision, subregion, and regional sea, nested at different levels. 

评论:用过去式。


[6] The analyses include weighting and no-weighting by each assessment area; for ecosystem component (water column, phytoplankton, fish, crustaceans, and molluscs); descriptor (three), and habitat (pelagic, demersal/benthic), with the confidence value of the status. 

[7] A sensitivity analysis was undertaken to determine a minimum number of indicators to include for a robust assessment. 

[8] We demonstrated that using NEAT in assessing the status of large marine areas, by aggregating indicators, ecosystem components and descriptors, at different spatial scales, can remove at least four out of the six barriers that managers and policy-makers confront when undertaking such assessments. 

评论:没有坚持“a, b, and c” (format)。


[9] This can be done by using open-access databases and already established targets. 

[10] Aggregating indicators of different origin is possible. 

评论:different origins?


[11] Around 40 indicators seem to be enough to obtain robust assessments. 

评论:seem to be enough显得弱弱的。

 

[12] It is better to integrate the assessment items using an ecosystem-based approach, rather than using the OOAO principle. 

[13] Using NEAT, this approach supports identifying the problematic environmental issues needing management attention and measures.

评论: This approach of using NEAT可能更好。

 

如果你想提高科技英语写作能力,请跟我来...

http://blog.sciencenet.cn/blog-306792-1146577.html

 

 

 



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