严禛译，毛宁波校

笑话1

A geophysicist was working on his computer at home. His wife said: "Honey, our new neighbor is making a lot of noises. Can you do something about it?” He replied without lifting his head up: “Noises? No problem. I got tons of filters here. What’s the frequency?”

某一天，一名地球物理学家正在家里用电脑办公，突然他的妻子对他说:“亲爱的，咱们的新邻居一直在制造噪音，你能去处理一下吗？”他不加思索头也不抬地回答道，“噪音？没问题！我这里有各种各样的滤波器，噪音的频带是多少？”

笑话2

The Boss asks a Geologist, an Engineer and a Geophysicist into his office.  He asks each of them the same question:  What is 2+3?
The Engineer answers:  5.0000000
The Geologist answers:  Somewhere between 4 and 6
The Geophysicist leans close to the boss and answers quietly:  What would you like it to be??

老板把地质学家、工程师和地球物理学家仨人叫到办公室，对他们每个人都问了同样一个问题:“2+3等于几？”工程师回答:“5.0000000。”地质学家回答:“结果处于4和6之间的某个值。”地球物理学家倾着身子悄悄说:“老板您想要什么结果？”

笑话3

seismologist can never get a steady job. 
Earthquakes are caused by faults of the Earth, so it's the Earth's fault.

地震学家不可能有一份稳定的工作。
地震是由于地球的断层（fault）引起的，所以地震是地球的错（fault）。

笑话4

Emily’s husband, Dave, is a geophysicist and he loves flowers. He often buys beautiful flowers to plant them in their backyard. Emily thought it’s sweet but never understood why the flowers always didn’t survive well – they always seemed to be broken. 
Until one day Dave proudly showed her a video about his field work. In the video, each time after Dave planted a geophone, he firmly stepped on it to ensure good soil/geophone contact.

Emily的丈夫Dave是一名爱花的地球物理学家。他经常买各种漂亮的花种在自家的后院里。Emily一直以为这很甜蜜，但是百思不得其解为什么丈夫种的花总是夭折—它们看起来像是被折断的。

直到某一天Dave自豪地向她展示一段有关他野外地震工作的视频，她才明白缘由。在视频里，每次当Dave埋置检波器时，他都会重重地补上两脚让检波器与土壤耦合的更好。

笑话5

Question: Why does a geophysicist like rational women?
Answer: Because they are anomalies.

 问题:“为什么地球物理学家喜欢理性的女性？”

答案:“因为他们是异常的（地球物理学家喜欢异常）。”