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My best friend, Frank Tung passed away five years ago on 11/15/06. I haveknown Frank longer than even his own immediate family – a total of 55 yearssince 1951 when we both worked at our first job in a summer resort inVermont.  Later we became collegeroommates and majored in the same discipline at MIT.  We were also initiated into the same collegeFraternity at the same time. In the fifties, fraternity hazing was at itsheight. I still remember the remark Frank made after the initiation, “If thisis what they do to you when they picked you to be brothers, what happens whenthey don’t like you”. During college years we even chased after the same girl.But never became jealous of each other and Frank was far more successful. Thereis an old saying about love, “Men like to be a women’s first love. Women liketo be a man’s last love”. Both Frank and I shared that fortune. We proposed toour wives of over 50 years simultaneously (but separately of course) after adouble date on Valentine’s Day in 1959. We were best man at each other’swedding; Godparents to each other’s first-born son and had the same number ofchildren and grand children. In terms of careers, except for a few years awayin CA and MI resp., we each spent our entire adult life in Greater Boston inone job.  To top it off, which two persons in the world can say that theyshare consecutive Social Security Numbers. Other moments we shared are too manyto mention. But one example illustrates them. On the morning my wife and Iwere going to move into our first house, I came down with a kidney stone attackwhich was excrutiatingly painful. I had to be hospitalized. Overnight there wasa snowstorm in addition. In desperation and with two small children of 5 and 3whom would my wife call? Frank quit work immediately and personally shoveled apath to our new house and helps settle in my wife and two small children. Thus,while we may not be brothers in blood, but certainly in name and in fact.

Finally we retired within one year of each other. But Frankdid not stop his public service. He was invited to chair a study sponsored bythe prestigious National Academy of Engineering on FAA preparedness andrestructuring. In his typical modest way, I don’t think he even mentioned thisto his friend.

During retirement we were members of a lunch club by the nameof Romeo, which stands for “Retired Old Men Eating Out”. We took turns to picka restaurant each months for a leisurely lunch from 11:30am to past 2pm.Members ages from 76 to 97. Thus Frank and I were at the younger end of thespectrum. The unofficial motto of the club which is also due to Shakespeare – afamous quote in which Shakespeare wrote “Isn’t it strange that “desire”outlives by so many years over “performance?” to which Frank and I alwaysresponded by “speak for yourself and not for me”. During these lunches, we talkabout anything and everything, China, politics, religion, and even sex. Ourfirst meeting next year will be at Frank’s favorite restaurant and we shallorder his favorite dishes.

I think it is also fate that we never got to say goodbye toeach other since I was away on an extended trip and did not even know he wasseriously ill. In this sense and in my mind, he is still with us. This is onlya temporary separation. So here to you, Frank. Reserve a seat at the Romeotable on the other side. I’ll be joining you in due time.

On this day of thanksgiving and remembrance in 2011, I am priviliged to call Frank my best friend.